Sunday, September 30, 2007
This.Is.So.Wrong.
i really really really should be studying and not doing this...but guess what?
i'm getting burnt out (i don't know why i comes so quickly this time)...i can't study and i keep find excuses to slack.
...i went to the pl funfair yesterday (see! slacking again!rah!), it was pretty fun meeting up with old friends yesterday but i only saw jeanne, jac,charisse,wendy and jessica though , maybe i was too early.Pei shan, dhini ,nic mao...4a1 where were the rest of you? The teachers were really busy, so we didn't really talk, but i was still glad to be back. And i found out the reason to why i love wearing shorts so much ... i realised that 90% of the girls that went back wore shorts=P...some weird culture that sprouted in pl.=)
I've been on the phone with nic wong everyday since the day the study break started and we broke our record with 5 hrs ...its not exactly unproductive though cause we really did talk about school work. It made me realise that it has been such a long time since we last talked on the phone for so long. We should do it more often.haha=)
met up with yi jia to study on friday and we were just talking on issue of how we both find it easier to make friends with people that come from english speaking schools. There are more common topics and the sense of humour is similar...the simplest things we say make each other laugh.This is just a generalisation though there are always exceptions to every rule=) I don't know why i'm saying this , it doesn't make a point...hmmm...
Monday, September 17, 2007
I . AM . SO . HUNGRY!
I dunno what's wrong with me. Seriously.
My brain's malfunctioning and my stomach's overworking with the excessive secretion of gastric juices. Give me a break. Will you 2 just coordinate for a moment? And i can't eat now cause dinner's in 20 minutes...
I dunno why i'm blogging this now , think its cause my brain is disfunctional and a hole is soon forming in my stomach...
I am so crappy=P
Sunday, September 16, 2007
here's what i used to think:
studying hard = good results
now its completely different:
study hard + lots and lots of luck/intellect = normal results
I never thought of myself as someone who was smart, just average maybe. But I never felt stupid either...I dunno...it's just that ever since i came to jc , its like everything's out of my control. I feel helpless and lost , maybe i'm striding down the wrong path but there's no turning back...i've got to move on.
People around me are just so smart...don't get me wrong, i'm not blaming them. It's just that this unequal distribution of intellect just makes me feel inferior...it's like some invisible force weighing down on me. It'll always be there though...its genetics , it cannot be altered.
What's worse is that despite the fact that i know how desperately i need to study to pass, i just cannot bring myself to do it. the motivation is just not there. I used to be able to feel it during the exam period but now...i dunno. Its absence just worsens the situation. I'm feeling stressed and this stupid slacking body i'm in just doesn't want to study (even if i do , its not productive), this adds to my stress!!!!(rah!)
I JUST HATE IT! AND ITS ALL MY FAULT! I HATE WHAT I'M TURNING INTO!I used to be happy, motivated and i was able to do well in school. Why must life change? everything is so different and i just resent it...I WANT MY LIFE BACK!
life just makes fools out of us;
we're just helpless pawns in this game of life
Thursday, September 13, 2007
For everything there is a season,And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
Monday, September 10, 2007
too much...
sometimes i just think i say too much...
its just that the words just force their way out...somehow...
i just say the wrong things at the wrong time , to the wrong people , about the things that i should not be even talking about ...
whats wrong with me ?!?!? maybe my EQ is just too low (hmmmm.....)
its inborn i guess...should try to change though ...i'll make an effort to
sow a thought ,reap and action,
sow an action ,reap a habit,
sow a habit ,reap a character,
sow a character ,reap a destiny.
Saturday, September 8, 2007
muggamania!!!
i've started mugging finally...just can't beat the stress from yj and claud. do the two of you have to be soooooo hardworking?omg i'm like so slack compared to you two. not exactly complaining though, if not for the two of them i'll probably still be slacking away.=P
lets see...i've just completed 3 chpts of phy and 2 chpts of chem ,none of econs and maths(needless to say LOL).rather bored now cause i'm staring at my integration qns from tuition and i'm blogging (hmmmm.....). its been half an hour and i'm STILL staring at them XP, guess i really
MUST start , aiya ,i still have to read the research paper for the disscusion later...this is quite bad ...no time!!!!
i better start now...BUCK UP ,DES!
...this is going to be a long long day...haiz
Thursday, September 6, 2007
New blog! LOL
hahas=p
really should be studying and i don't know why i'm doing this right now...just one of those silly things that you feel that you must do once in a while i guess.
anyway, was just viewing some blogs just now and i realised that i'm missing out on the lives of those who used to mean alot to me. The past made us friends , the future makes us....strangers??? i hope not afterall friendships shouldn't be so brittle right?
I realised that i get emo easily ,don't know why... was just thinking of the good old days (wasn't too long ago ,i guess) where life was simpler and i realised that the more time forces us to move on the more we want to look back at the past...then i thought of pl and this song 'go light your world'. really great song , many of the pl-lites will agree with me XP
Go Light Your World
4:27 PM